Saturday, January 15, 2011

Almost Time

Saturday, January 15, 2011
Dear baby Bryson,
                I cannot believe that I am almost 37 weeks pregnant!  I will be considered ‘full-term’ on Monday, which means that you can make your appearance any day now!  At my 36 week appointment my midwife did an exam and informed me that I was 1.5 cm dilated and about 50% effaced.   She also estimated your weight at about 5.5 lbs. I hope that you stay small! 
I had your baby shower back in October.  It was so much fun!  We had so many come to welcome you!  It was held at a little local place called “The Frosted Mug”.  This is where your dad and I went on our first date!  Everyone dressed in their favorite football team jersey or shirt and we had a little ‘pre-game’ party in your honor!  (since your due date is the day after the super bowl this year)  We received so many nice gifts for you!  Things that are necessities and things are just super cute!  We even got a few Steelers outfits for you!
                Christmas was really hard for me this year.  Everywhere that I looked I saw a happy couple with their new baby and it made me want you here so bad!  Your dad and I spent Christmas day at my parents house, and the day after Christmas we spent at home and the entire Adams family came to celebrate.  At that Christmas dinner, your cousin Miranda (although I am sure you will call her Aunt Miranda) and her husband Brian announced that they are pregnant!  I was so excited for them, but also for you!  Now I know that you will have a cousin your age to grow up with!  Miranda is exactly 27 weeks behind me in her pregnancy.  She is due August the 15th.
When I woke up on December the 27th, I realized that you had dropped!  My belly was so much lower than it had previously been.  That was my first sign that soon you would be here!   After that, about 2 or 3 weeks ago, I began nesting!  I am running around the house like a crazy woman!  I cannot seem to sit still long enough to relax.  But with this, your nursery is now complete and our home is spotless.  My hospital bags are packed, and the car seat is installed in the car.  The only thing I am waiting on is you!!!
                I remember when I found out that I was pregnant, no, before that…. when I had a ‘gut’ feeling that I was pregnant.  I was terrified.  And I guess I still am a little, but not about labor or about being a mother, but about not being good enough for you.  Because you, my baby, deserve more than anyone else in this world.  You are my world and I have not yet met you, you are my life and I have not yet held you.  Bryson, I never knew how much I could love someone, until your dad and I created you.
                So, baby, anytime you are ready… please come out.  I need you so badly!  I need to hold you and kiss you and know that you are healthy and safe.  I need to go to sleep at night knowing that at any time during the night I can get up and hold you in my arms.  I’ve only truly loved twice in my life.  Once with your father, and now you.  With every move you make in my belly…. My heart skips a beat.  I cannot wait to see your face, squeeze your tiny little hand, and watch you love your father. 
                I cannot wait to be a family of three.  <3

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